It has been a month since my classes began...a month of juggling a full time job, night classes four evenings a week, volunteering at the cat shelter once a week, a social life, my live-in cat Hooligan, and my live-in boyfriend.
Let me begin with the reason why I've returned to high school. When I was actually in real high school, a co-ed boarding school to be more specific, I was terrified of math class...so terrified in fact that I never asked for help and subsequently failed my grade 10 advanced math course. And science went down the drain too. Luckily for me they just moved me up into grade 11 bobo math! Or so I thought I was lucky at the time...
Advice to all who plan on having babies: make sure they do their advanced math and sciences in high school! There's always time for finger painting and drama, but having your math and sciences from high school is such a door-opener as I'm now learning. So, I decided that 2012 was a "face my fear" kind of year and I jumped in head first. Just a side note: I did attempt to get these classes done in adult ed when I lived in Toronto, but it proved to be a disaster when I discovered that I couldn't read my teacher's handwriting or understand what was apparently the English language coming out of his mouth. I dropped out after my first class.
So, to face my fears I decided to pick up math and science again, to challenge myself and to pretty much push myself to the edge of insanity. I got myself a whopping 50% on my first math test which almost made me throw up from fear, but since then I have very slowly been improving and wrapping my brain around radicals, polynomials, factoring and so on. I raise my hand at least 5 times every class...I'm that annoying person who you hate, the one that doesn't understand something until it's explained multiple times over. I've heard a sigh or two behind me, but I don't care! At least I can ask questions now, without the fear of God in me.
Science has been interesting to say the least. In our first class, our teacher went around and asked each of us a series of questions: name, why we were there, and one word to describe science, which he then jotted down on the blackboard. I was about fourth in line to introduce myself, and my word to describe science was "intriguing", which of course had just been said by another student as my teacher so kindly pointed out. Great, my first science class and my teacher already thinks that I don't pay attention. I was so wrapped up in having to speak in front of the other students that I tuned everything out to try and find a good descriptive word for science. Yes, it's like high school all over again.
I got off to a shaky start in science because the first part is all about math, but then I found my groove. I also managed to land myself a hilarious lab partner who tells me about his food adventures every time I see him. Actually, during the first week of classes he pulled out his snack at break which happened to be two hamburgers, straight from his duffle bag. Phenomenal. Anyway, yesterday in our lab while I added more Zinc bits to the triple beam scale and he talked to me about his experience ordering a flurry from MacDonald's with bacon in it, our teacher came over to chat with us.
He asked us if we had taken the class recently because he noticed that we were doing well. Thank the baby Jesus! A complement on my school grades! I told him that I had done horribly in high school and that I was redeeming myself, putting my mind at peace, and succeeding in an area that I had seriously failed in 13 years ago. I went on to explain that I went into fine arts after high school, then got my BA in Political Science, then worked for the World Wildlife Fund, that I currently work for a charity focussing on the health of diabetic children, and that I'm now getting my grades in math and science to see where they can take me. He laughed and said that he found it so great to come upon a perpetual student who has such a diversity of interests and capabilities.
The word capabilities (notice the plural) is key here. I have many capabilities as opposed to the many who have very few capabilities ie; zero life experience. I took my teachers words as a compliment and it made me realize that my ever-changing path isn't such a bad thing. I've always thought about my past as a series of unplanned and confusing choices, jack of all trades and master of none. Now I know that there are people out there, even science teachers, who appreciate the randomness of life choices and ever changing plans as much as I do!
So, cheers to challenges, to conquering our fears, to being brave and to working damn hard. Cheers to experiencing as many different aspects of life as you can, and a big cheers to the people out there who support and appreciate the adventurous souls!
And cheers to passing math.
your description of science is perfect. science is curiosity, and you find science intriguing because you're curious. and with that you're now an amateur scientist, level 1!
ReplyDeleteto do any good with curiosity besides entertain yourself, you need testing and learning from mistakes. with that and your constant curiosity you will generate new things to be curious about. curiosity, testing, and learning is a cycle known to some as the scientific method, and with your demonstration of this, you've made amateur scientist level 2!
one exciting thing to note is that a fear of failure is very much antithetical to the scientific method. because as long as you believe the premise that no one is capable of constant perfection, then anyone who iterates through the processes of hypothesis then testing is bound to be wrong... a lot.
by my logic above, failure is mandatory for success. that is exciting, and a very empowering fact if one makes it their personal philosophy.
keep up this great effort!